Which is something I didn't think I'd ever be able to say, at least not when I was a great deal younger.
Not being OK, or partly broken was so much a part of who I am and was it's hard to separate it out. But now I look at my life and while its not perfect I'm OK. And I wonder does it still define who I am now? So much so that when something good happens, a part of me is always waiting for the bad to follow. Because deep down I don't think it can last. History has shown me otherwise, or is that just self fulfilling prophecy or worse some sort of warped coping mechanism.
I don't really have the answer.
However questions remain, more so because when I encountered others that have shared this kindred path of being so disconnected from life that you are fatalistic in all your outlooks. You know how to recognise it. And I think do they see it in me? Do I wear it like a badge or am I now normal?
The good news is there is more Gelato out there. The bad news was, this isn't a good addition.
This place has the advantage of being right on my door step, so this was a dangerous prospect. I've no idea how long the Portobello Road branch has been there but I've certainly never noticed it. Being in a rush and happening on this place after I'd already eaten a huge lunch all I could manage was one scoop.
Given the high price it seems all I could afford was one scoop anyway. This might sound pedantic but that scoop did not fill the cup - like all the other places that really pack it in there. Nor were the staff particularly open to letting us try other flavours.
But I digress. I have to say while this wasn't the worst coconut I've had it was very disappointing. It was heavy and tasted more like a cheap ice cream then a light gelato. I was also overly cold. One of the things I enjoy about gelato is that it is lighter and a tad warmer, which mak…
I just got off the phone with my mum about her test results. She's awaiting surgery and needs some tests before a date can be confirmed.
Right now we don't know if its cancer but given the situation, the surgeon and nurse feel there is a high likelihood. Best operate now and deal with the illness fully.
How did we find out?
She went to a routine NHS colon screening check. One the NHS offers to people over a certain age to screen for bowel cancer. This is not a service that is mandatory. But thanks to this very screening the doctors and nurses we able to catch my mum's condition before she showed any out ward symptoms. They started treating her right away. A nurse has been checking up on my mum since.
We met with the nurse and surgeon last week to talk about what they found and the next steps.
I cannot praise the medical staff enough, they explained everything, answered our questions and immediately started booking the pre-surgery screenings.